Someone somewhere said hindsight is 20/20.
That often seems to be one of those annoying aphorisms that people throw at you when they know you made a bad decision and now you have to fend off the consequences. If you never heard it before, it pretty much just means that you can see more clearly once you've looked at what you've done, rather than at what you will do. So--why do you think that is?
Let's take it a step further.
What is the worst decision you ever made? You have hindsight now, so you should be able to see it from every angle--the risks, sacrifices, rewards and consequences.
In your heart of hearts, with no false sense of modesty or conceit, was the outcome of the decision worth what you paid for it? In other words, was the benefit worth the cost? Why or why not?
What would you change?
If you're one of those folks who like to say they regret nothing because everything they've done made them who they are now--please don't.
You're too young to say that yet, and I mean that in the purest way possible, with no disdain or contempt for your age. Biologically, your brain is simply not able to rationalize the decisions you make when you're "feelin' yourself" because your pre-frontal cortex (that part of your brain that controls impulse and decision-making) isn't fully formed. So, technically--you aren't who you will be just yet.
Don't believe me--look it up. Here's a link if you're interested: Teenagers Brain Development
Now, let's look ahead to the future. Imagine your future child makes the same bad decision you did. Knowing all the things you don't like about how your parents try to tell you about yourself--how are you going to teach, reprimand, respond to your kid's choice?
I think its easier to see why something once wrong after you do it.Mostly, because, you see it in a different perspective.Most dumb decisions people make are fun decisions in all actuality or because, they wanted to try something new.Everyday theirs people who end up trying drugs and reap the consiquence of being an addict.People experiment with sex and often have no intentions on having a baby.Some mistakes we make we can't take back.So, the major key to making a mistake is learning from it before its to late.I think the biggest mistake I've ever made was dating a jerk for a whole year.I was stupid I didn't listen to people when they tried to warn me.I didn't pay attention of the signs he showed me continously that he wasn't worth my time.He showed me the person he was and I still saw only the good in him.I know I made the mistake because, I cared about him and I never thought he'd have intentions on betraying me.So, the lesson behind my mistake that I finally realized once I had enough was that everybody doesn't have the same heart as you.People are only going to do what you allow them to do.Once I came to that realization I broke up with him best decision I ever made honestly.You should be with someone who makes you happy that shows you the way your supposed to be treated.Whether your a male or a female really doesn't matter you should get back the effort that you put out.
ReplyDeleteLooking into the future if I had a child who came to me telling me they dealing with someone whose an asshole I would let then stay with them till they realize.Of course, I could tell them they're never allowed to talk to that person anymore but, what does that change? Nothing at all you can't control your childs life at a certain point all you can do is give them the tools and advice and hope they use them.Because, if you tell them to leave the person alone they'll just end up going behind your back.Allow them to stay honest with you! Thats key and eventually they will want better and they'll do better.
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ReplyDeleteI was a drug addict for 8 months. I knew it would be healthy for me to let go, but I couldn’t. He gave me this high that I never wanted to come down from. I was addicted. I was in love with someone who kept damaging my state of mind.
ReplyDeleteI was cheated on four different times and somehow I managed to blame myself. I would tell myself see him more and do what he says and maybe he won’t cheat. Maybe if you stop telling people you two are dating he wouldn’t yell at you? Or maybe if you just stop stalking his accounts you won’t see things you don’t like? Maybe you wouldn’t have found out about S.F. and the others?
The worst mistake I had ever made was blaming myself for his flaws and not valuing my self-worth. Blaming myself had cost me to stay in a longer relationship that would be harder for be to let go the longer I stayed. Blaming and trying to change myself did nothing to help fix our problems.
If I could change anything I would have left the moment I found out about A.A. I would left when he called me a selfish bitch because I didn’t have any money to give. I would have told him to kiss my ass because I’m the catch and I’m begging no man to stay with me.
It takes most people including myself a period of detachment in order to properly decipher a situation because it allows the feelings to simmer. When you are too emotional you have a tendency to blame everyone else, but yourself. Taking time away from him had giving me time to reflect on the situation. It had allowed me to look at all sides of the story.
When it comes to my daughter I’d tell her boys are like buses when one leaves another will arrive, so don’t beg or change yourself so a man will stay. I’d tell her she’s a goddess and shouldn’t be treated otherwise. I’d start by saying this to her young to make sure it sticks in her head.
ReplyDeleteI’ve heard the phrase “somewhere hindsight is 20/20” countless times. The internet definition being “the ability to understand an event or situation only after it has happened.” In my perception, meaning, being blinded by any sense of consequence before the action has physically been done, only after can you see what you got yourself into. Why do I think that is? I think it has to do with the sense of “being the bigger person” aspect. Being able to accept that what you did was wrong and seeing any consequence being well deserved on your end.
I know you said we can’t write about having “no regrets,” or being that kind of person. That the “decision-making” part of our brain isn’t fully formed yet, and I completely agree, my brain, only being a careless teenager is blinded by a lot of “right-paths,” leading me down several bad ones. But if I’m talking about the present and past me I would be lying to you as well as myself if I said I had some big regret hidden deep inside me. And here’s why:
Being Catholic, I truly believe that God has my entire life planned out for me. He knows what I’m thinking right now, and what I’m going to be thinking five years from now and what I was thinking five years ago. He knows what decisions I’m going to make, good or bad. I believe that if I were to regret something it wouldn’t have happened. That everything has a purpose, a lesson that goes along with it, that all these “regrets” were supposed to happen. Many will most likely think I’m “out of my mind” and mentally blind for this. I completely believe in fate, everything happens for a reason, and all reasons are held in God’s hands. I accept all consequences and costs as things that were always going to happen to me.
As a future parent (hopefully) I want to give as much empathy as possible, not sympathy. I want to “go back” to their age and think about what I would do and how my mom telling me “no” would effect my decision, usually making me want to do something even more. This effecting any type of response given to my child about decision-making. Majority of parents thinking everything their child does will put them in danger, I will without a doubt be one of those too. Our parents our only looking out for us and want what’s best for us, as do for my kid. If my future kid makes a decision that I don’t think was in their “best interest” I don’t want to punish them. As my mom would do to me, I will not only let them know but make them emotionally feel how disappointed I am in them, in my eyes being worse than any punishment or “grounding” could be.
I think that you can see more clearly at your past choices rather than your future choices because you have already made them. Your past is the past. Nothing can change that. You can look back at the choices you have made thus far, and examine them to see if you would have wanted to do anything differently. You can't say the same for you future choices, because you cannot know for sure what you will do in the future. You can say that you want to be a biologist when you grow up because you love animals, but realize later on that it isn't what you want to do for the rest of your life.
ReplyDeleteThe worst mistake I ever made was when I never asked out my very first crush. To be completely honest, my first crush was not my first love. Now that I have looked back on it, I saw it as nothing more but an infatuation, I guess. I regretted my decision at the time. After I had moved from Georgia to Virginia at the end of 8th grade, I texted her and told her I had liked her. It took a few moments, but she responded saying that she had liked me too, and always wondered why I never made a move. MY shy, cowardly self didn't have the courage to go up to a girl and ask her out, and I paid the price. I may never know what could have happened between us, but, like I said, the past is the past and you can't change that. If I could change it, I wouldn't, simply because old friends from Georgia that I still keep contact with, have told me the type of person she has turned into.
When I have kids, they will have the power to make the choices they want to make when I am not around. Now, I'm not saying that I would let my kids do whatever they want. And I am also not saying that I would make every single choice for my children, either. The only thing you can do as a parent, is to guide and teach your kids to choose the right choice that would benefit their future. Sure, as a kid, you make bad decisions. But hopefully, they will learn from their choices and continue on a better path. If not, that's when you step in to redirect them. A child with no freedom is not a child, but a prisoner.
Many people regret different things throughout their life and I think it’s hard to believe that somebody truly doesn’t regret anything. Honestly, i’m the type of person who regrets something right after I do it whether it’s lying,cheating or being in a relationship with someone.I think my biggest regret is chasing people who never cared about me. I tend to get very attached to people and when I do, I start to believe everything they tell me blindly. I always think, if they care about me, they would never do anything to hurt me, but everytime I put my trust into someone or think they care about me I end up being wrong. I’ve regretted letting people be the cause for my happiness because as soon as they leave me without any explanation, I slowly began to doubt if they ever cared in the first place. These days I think the only reason someone says they care about you or they love you is either just to say it or because they think they going to get something. I'm the person who will try to keep someone in my life even if it's months after we stopped talking. My ego is probably one of the worst things about me and if someone stops talking to me , my ego will stop me and tell me to wait for them to come to me first. I will eventually break my ego whether it’s after days,weeks,months or even years, but I definitely will fight to keep someone in my life even if the person could care less whether I was in their life or not. I regret doing this because when I fight for someone, I don't realize that these are the same people who use me, make me feel bad to get what they want, or i'm just a form of time pass for them. I realized later on in life that nobody really has you like you have yourself. You shouldn’t have to fight for anyone to stay in your life. I’m glad i’ve had people in my life that have put me in situations where I realized this. I learned not everyone cares and loves you as much as they claim they do and some people just don’t care what will happen to you after they leave.
ReplyDeleteAs for my future children, I’ll tell them to never base their happiness off a person that’s only going to be temporary. Never believe a person's words, but rather look at their actions because it shows much more. Don't ever force anyone to stay in your life because someone who truly cares about you would never put themselves in a position to lose you. Don’t be naive and trust what everyone tells you because in the end, everyone only cares about themselves.
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ReplyDeleteIn the action of doing something, you don’t necessarily think about whether what you are doing is right or even wrong. There is not one person on this earth who has not made mistakes or bad decisions throughout their entire life. Mistakes are learned from after you make them. It’s only up to you to decide if you are going to work on not making the same mistakes again. In my opinion it is always easier to determine if what you did was wrong after you did it just because you can have a different perspective on it after it has been done.
ReplyDeleteAfter continuously going through the same thing over and over for the past couple of years, I have realized that my worst mistake has been putting trust into people. I am the type of person who feels as though that everyone has the same heart as me. If I do right to you, you will have no choice but to do right to me. If I don’t betray you or hurt you, you won’t betray or hurt me. After, years of experiencing the betrayal from friends and even someone I truly loved, I realized, that is not how it works. The things that people do to me, I would NEVER do to them just because of the type of person that I am. I would never imagine myself, doing wrong to someone or even trying to do something that will hurt them, even if they did it to me. I have been in so many positions where people has made it extremely hard to trust anyone now. In my opinion, no one can be trusted. Especially the ones who smile in your face every single day. The consequence of this action was always getting my feelings hurt at the end. Still, I always forgave the person.
I feel as though that the outcome(s) of this mistake was very beneficial. Only because I can move forward and learn to not trust anyone anymore. Sad to say, I do have trust issues now, but it’s going to save me from any negative outcomes later in life. If I could, I would change people’s mindset to be just like mine, but that’s impossible.
Later in the future, when I have my own children, if they were to make the same mistake as me, I would let them go through it. It sounds harsh, but it’s not. Kids always learn the hard way, and I must say I’m one of those kids. For many years, my mom has ALWAYS told me about my friends and the people who was always doing me wrong. Of course, I didn’t want to hear it because I believed that they were my true friends, so I let it go into one ear and out the other. Soon, my mom just stopped telling me and she let me see for myself, and I appreciate it because It helped me become a stronger person. When my children do go through the same thing, I am going to let them talk to me first and go from there.
In the midst of doing something, you don’t really think that deeply into it while doing it. That may not be the case for some actions, but for most, that’s kind of just how it goes; we do something and we look back on it. That’s how we learn, how we grow, and how we mature. None of us would be learning from our mistakes that we so commonly make at this age if we didn’t have the ability to look back on them and know what we did wrong.
ReplyDeleteIf you know me, you know that I am the EPITOME of a goodie goodie. Although I can’t say that I have ever made a decision that got me into serious trouble, that doesn’t mean that I haven’t made some pretty awful decisions in the past when it comes to my own personal good. Now when I say “personal good”, I’m not talking about drinking or drugs or anything that harms me physically. When I say “personal good”, I’m talking about my emotional health… The worst decision I’ve made that I can think of was putting my trust into someone that didn’t deserve my trust. I’m not going to start “throwing shade” towards this person, mainly because he was a major part of my life and I don’t regret having a relationship with him because I was happy with him, but he definitely did not deserve my trust, and giving that to him to take it from me and run with it was the worst decision I have made.
Me giving him my trust only resulted in more trust issues for myself, so I can’t say that the outcome was worth it, but I also can’t say it wasn’t. Don’t get me wrong, being stripped of my trust absolutely sucks, but I wouldn’t be as strong as I am today if that didn’t happen. I was put into a situation where I had to focus on my own health and work to lift my spirits up on my own, which molded me into a much stronger girl, the girl I am now. As my peers say, it was a minor setback for a major comeback. I had to be let down in order to rise up. I wouldn’t change anything about it, mostly because if my trust were still safe in his arms, I wouldn’t be nearly as strong as I am right now typing this.
Again, my worst decision ever wasn’t something that put me in trouble with my parents, friends, or the law. Now that I look back on it, all it was is something that I should’ve thought more about. If my future child were to be put through what I was put through, I would only hope that he or she would get the same lessons out of it that I did. I would hope that they will find the strength in themselves to stand their ground and hold their own and know that they are worth more than someone that takes advantage of their trust. As much as I can talk to them about that, I can’t teach that. I will let them make their own decisions when it comes to who they should be trusting, only because they need to learn on their own and figure it out for themselves. I will be there to guide them in the right direction, but it all comes down to them. And I can only hope that if a relationship turns into a lesson for them, that they will learn from it.
When we do something dumb either two things occur in my mind, either we accept the mistake and realize we were stupid, or we make an excuse for what we did. I reoccurring problem in high school is partying. We party on weekends and come to school then party on the weekends again, it is a cycle that we rarely break. We make an excuse that we are young and having fun rather then realizing what we are doing should stop. So to say that we learn from our mistakes isn’t always necessarily true, but when we do it is because we accept the fact that what we did was not a smart decision. I have made many mistakes in my life and will continue to do so, are the outcomes worth it? Sometimes no, not that I label one mistake worse than another, but I know that the worse of my mistakes I’ve made I would not do again. I’ve put myself in danger for the sake of fun or out of anger, but how I react to situations has been altered a bit after these mistakes. The problem with mistakes in youth is we think we know everything. We think our parents never we kids, and they have no idea what they are talking about, we have too much pride. That is the nature of children and there is not much you can do about it. They we do what they want regardless and it will take mistakes for them to learn. Experience is what will give them the change in heart and the change of how they conduct themselves. When I have kids I know they won’t listen to me so all I can hope is that they don’t make a mistake that will affect their whole life and that they will learn and not make the same stupid mistake twice.
ReplyDeleteAfter making a bad decision, you are immediately filled with regret and you go through every other scenario that you could have made to avoid your decision. Looking back on things you did wrong in the past is easy because you can look at it in many different perspectives and learn from what you did and how you did them. The worst decision I have ever made is not something I like to talk about so I’m going to talk about a much smaller one that I still make to this day. Putting my trust into people is something I struggle with. Once I become close with someone, I feel that I can trust them with anything and that they will always be there for me when I need them. In the past, I’ve trusted several people with a lot of things. They’d be the ones I’d go to for everything. After being misled many of times, I have learned how it should be and how to not be bothered by it. The outcome actually benefited me because now I know who I can’t trust and who I shouldn't be around. Now, there are only a couple people who stand by me and continue to never let me down. In the future, if my children make the same choices I do, I would let them experience it so they’d be able to learn from it. They’ll learn who they can and can’t trust and they’ll learn that God puts people in your life for a reason and removes them from your life for a better reason.
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ReplyDeleteBad decisions are in human nature and everybody has made bad decisions in life. I have made bad decisions in life just not major ones, but one bad decision I have made in life is not going out and making the most of my youth. I know that I still am young but I feel it is to late for me to. Ever since I was little my favorite thing to do was to play video games and has always been my main hobby. To some people it sounds sad but to me playing video games is my favorite thing to do and has always been apart of my life. As I grew I played more and learned about different genres of games and became more knowledgeable which made me a more avid gamer. I do sometimes question if all of it is too much for me. There have been parties I skipped out on or dances in school I didn't go to because I rather spend time with my friends on video games because that is me. Now I question whether or I should have gone to these occasions and should have done more. Although I didn't like to skip out on family occasions because I could never bring myself to do that and would regret it. I don't blame video games but more to myself for being like this. Everything thing that I did has made me what I am today. I am very shy most of the time and won't just go out and try to make new friends or go out and make things happen to me. I always just stumbled across friends which I am very lucky to have done but feel I could have made more friends in my life. The weird thing is that I wouldn't change a thing in my life. It is now hard to grasp why people want to go out all the time and go all out into the world. I am happy where I am and who I am but more thoughtful of what my life could have been if I wasn't like this. If my children did make the same bad decision as me I would always remind them to live a little in life but still do what makes you happy. If they want to stay home all day and play video games then they can do that but just once in a while just go out and do something out of the ordinary to them. Like I said before I never really made any major bad decisions so this was hard for me to word as a bad decision due to me growing up in a different way.
ReplyDeleteHindsight is 20/20, for the simple reason that the consequence is available to judge the action off of. What is the worst decision I’ve ever made? I honestly couldn’t tell you. If I did something at a particular time, I know I did it for a reason, and I was trying to get the best possible outcome. Of course I’ve made mistakes, but I would never wish to change something, or regret what I did. Everything I’ve done was for a reason, a good reason at that. Of course I look back and say I wish I would’ve tried harder in a class, or worked out more to enhance my athletic abilities, but I can still change that. I can still make up for that. I haven’t been in that many situations where I have to make a decision that is completely important. I have never cut somebody off that didn't deserve it, nobody has ever thrown away my trust, and I have never thrown away anyone's trust towards me. I'm a loner, so I stay by myself on the weekends and avoid trouble. Maybe in the future I'll regret that, but as of right now, it's what makes me happy, and what keeps me sane. I know I’m not supposed to write about me not having regrets, or me not feeling like I made a bad mistake, but I honestly can’t think of one. A lose is never a lose, and mistakes are necessary. Now, if my kid starts making mistakes like I did, I will make sure they know what that mistake can lead to, but I’m not going to pressure them to change, or do what I want, instead of what they want. If they continue to make the same mistake, I will take stricter action and make sure they get their stuff together, but I think trial and error is important for kids. Without seeing the negatives, the positives aren’t as pretty.
ReplyDeleteThis blog is pretty sensitive to me. And it’s not sensitive because I have done something that haunts and taunts me till this day, it's sensitive because I honestly can't recall a time where I've regretted making a decision. And I guess that is the amazing idea around a blog. We can go back to this topic in a couple of months and I can tell you about a decision I regret if it ever happens. But right now for the time being, I can't think of any horrific decision I made in my life. Because I am an introvert that is still trying to get comfortable with the world. And the world is a scary place to live in. And past events in my life that I had no control over has prompted me to be the way I am today. I don’t go to parties (as if I was invited), I can't travel the area because I don't have a license yet and my mom is always working. Plus my dad lives in Millville with my brother and that's about the only time I get to connect with my dad's side of the family. As a matter of fact, on the outside of me, you see a quirky, somewhat outgoing, caring boy who appears at some games at Oakcrest or events at Oakcrest.
ReplyDeleteAnd that is the outlook I truly want people to have of me. But that's the thing: I guess for all intended purposes of this blog response, the worst decision I've made is not being as social. But that is a problem I try to fix for myself everyday. I mean just two summers ago, I didn't even have a social network because i didn't think I needed it. But then you start to see all your friends have a Twitter or a Instagram and a Snapchat and a Facebook. That's when you start to realize that you live in a new age where society is yoked together by technology. (The use of SAT vocabulary words *wink). And it's nothing bad to have, it's just the new way of getting to personally know someone. It's been two years since I've had a Twitter, Instagram and Snapchat and I've connected with so many people with them. I mean if you know anybody who watches my Snapchat, they'll probably tell you that it's full of vibrant, funny stuff, including my Cooking Show. And I make it my purpose everyday to put a smile on someone's face when I do something. Even if it's one person I do that with, that makes me happy and that's the thing with being social. I wish I was always like this. I certainly think I have evolved from being the extremely shy kid who would never talk, curse or say anything unless told to in Hess and Davies, to someone who's in Media, and is always the passionate fan with body paint on at football games here at Oakcrest.
And if I ever have kids, the one thing I would teach them to do is be social. Because not only is society evolving, technology is taking over the world. And by the time 2034 hits, hopefully we’ll be in a society where they'll be automatic driving cars and holographic blackboards and so much more. If I could go back in time and tell my past self one thing, it would definitely be to stop being a wuss and let people know you. Let people know who Rodgerick Cameron Mccoullum truly is.
I have found that while you are in the moment of something, your state of mind isn’t really clear. Whether its being in a relationship, or hanging out with a bad group of kids, or even being in an argument with a friend or family member. Emotions tend to alter your thinking so it is very easy to get caught up in something. However, after the fact, most of the time it is pretty clear to see what went wrong and what went right. That’s because your emotions have calmed down and you have time to analyze. I cant think of my worst decision that I have made. I know there are times where I have made very bad decisions but at the moment I cant remember the WORST. So, I will not be talking about one of my bad decisions. I will simply mention a decision I have made that lead to many risks. That is, getting in a relationship with a drug addict. There really isn’t a nicer way to say it. A flat-out drug addict. And I knew it. But at the time my emotions took control over me and I still made the decision to get into that kind of relationship. I knew it was a bad decision to stay with him I can easily say that the outcome of the decision is worth what I paid for. The outcome left me a mess but it was worth it. In the moment, I was the happiest Ive ever been. Two years of being an emotional mess is honestly worth having those two months of extreme happiness. Some people may think I am crazy. But with that being said, the benefit was worth the cost.
ReplyDeleteOh boy. This question with regards to parenting is certainly a hard one. I think the best way to have a child learn is to let them go through something without you interfering- unless you have to. I believe my children should learn things for themselves and see it in their own eyes. That means I should not get involved. With my “bad”, non-regretful decision, my parents interfered because it became dangerous. Clearly, if it gets to the point where my child is at a risk of danger then I will step in and help them redirect their mind. But other than that, you need to learn it for yourself.
I’ve definitely had my fair share of some pretty bad and thoughtless decisions, and I feel as though while you’re in the moment, you don’t necessarily realize what you’re doing wrong. The worst decision I’ve ever made was giving a boy the power to determine my happiness. Now, it’s not like I sat there and literally decided, “Okay, I’m going to let this boy ruin my life.”, but it was still something I let happen, and it’s still something I strongly regret. I’m not going to go into deep detail about the entire situation because it isn’t the point. The point is that even though it took me a while, I eventually came to the conclusion that ABSOLUTELY NO ONE DETERMINES MY WELL-BEING BUT MYSELF!!!!!!!! I guess you could say that at the time it was a really rough period for me, but honestly, without all of it happening, I probably would’ve still been letting myself get taken advantage of, and I’m glad that now, I realize my worth, and realize that I have the key to my own happiness. Out of all the bad that happened, I gained more positive traits and I’m extremely proud of myself for that, so in a way, everything was worth it because I’m such a different person now (in a good way) because of it. If in the future, my own child is going through the same thing I was, I’m going to guide them, and give them as much advice as I possibly could, but also let them try and figure it out on their own. I believe that the best decisions and outcomes are the ones that you make on your own, and even though it may take longer than you want it to, it’ll eventually come, and he or she will finally be happy and not have such a negative cloud hanging over their head.
ReplyDeleteGrowing up I used to think my mistakes wouldn't have a huge impact on my life. As I grew the impact of my mistakes did also. My worst decision would either have to be giving in to my depression, or relying on someone else for happiness. Both of these were just excuses to not deal with my problems. Relying on someone else for my own happiness was just wrong. I learned this the hard way. It was so much easier to rely on a cute text, a hug, a smile, etc. instead of having to deal with my issues deep down. I would distract myself from the true. When it was over, it only made it worse. I completely lost myself. Over time I was able to fix myself, I was able to find happiness in things other than her and I was strong again. I learned how bad it is to rely on someone else for happiness. When she came back I made sure I wouldn't make the same mistake and I'm so happy. Giving into my depression was and never will be a good decision. It was only a temporary fix to my issues. Talking about my issues and working on a healthy solution was better.
ReplyDeleteWhen I'm older and my children are my age or around about my age then I hope to God they do not make the same mistakes I've made. First off, I hope my children don't receive depression. I hope my kids don't deal with their pain like I do. I push my problems away and it completely overwhelms me to my breaking point, and is totally unhealthy. I wish for my kids to not make someone their happiness because I don't want my kids to deal with that pain. Although I don't want them to go through that pain I'm not going to be up my kids' ass when he/she is in a relationship. If he/she is old enough for a relationship they're old enough to make their own decisions. I believe people learn best from their mistakes. A baby won't believe you completely about not touching something hot until they touch it for themselves and really learn what hot means. They learn to not touch something hot again. We learn from our mistakes and that's what I want my kids to do. I'm not going to let my kids completely go wild and do what ever they please, but I'm not going to be down their throats.
Growing up, I've always been the "bad" kid in my family, which I honestly don't understand why. Although I talk back to my parents, I'm very respectful and listen to what and when I'm told. The only reason I could possible be labeled as the "bad" kid, would be the decisions I have made. Now, I say, there could be worse than a lot of the things I have done and kids make mistakes, it's a part of our "growing up" stage. So, When talking about bad decisions, I could literally go all day naming a variety of events that I now regret. However, I'll only go on to tell one of my many regrets, which is kind of personal to me..
ReplyDeleteTo this day, I regret not building a close relationship with my great grandma before she passed away my freshman year. And every time I think upon my lack of interest in bonding with her, I break down in tears. Out of all of the times I have gotten the chance to sit down and talk to my great grandma, I don't think I ever did. The most I did was give her a kiss on the cheek and a small hug.
Don't get me wrong, I didn't avoid contact with her because I didn't like her or because she smelled horrible. The only reason that I had for my muteness would be something I wouldn't be able to tell you. And that's another reason why it irritates me that I didn't talk to her, because not only did I not talk to her, I didn't have a reason not to. I hate when my family talks about all the different stories they have with her and how close they were to her, and I have none. Well, except the fact that I used to go to her house every Sunday.
All that I have left of my great grandmother was the stories of everyone else and her. And it leaves me feeling guilty and i'm honestly heart broken from it. She was such a heart warming, and strong lady, especially being a survivor of breast cancer. If I could go back and change one thing, it would be to create that special bond everyone else had, except it would be only ours to have. And mine to hold onto for memories.
In the future, if my kids were to make the decision I did, I would immediately stop it as soon as I notice it. And it's pretty simple to see the lack of connection, which would be when my kid is sitting on the far end of the couch or stuck on his/hers phone texting away distant from the family. I would advise them of the pain they would feel if and when their great grandma was to pass away. Also, they wouldn't be able to use their phone if we spend time with the family. And it would all be because I wouldn't want them to feel guilty for not taking the action to do something as simple as speak up to their loved ones.
I don’t regret much, and no it’s not because the things I have done in the past have shaped me to who I am today. I don’t regret much simply because I don’t let myself fall into situations worth regretting. I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, I don’t adventure too far from home. I just don’t push myself outside of my comfort zone. But I wasn’t always like this, I have regretted doing things, and those things, although they have little meaning to my life, made me this way. Those things made me not want to regret anything else. Before I begin, understand that this will be the most childish story ever and you’ll probably think I’m crazy for letting these decisions get to me so much. Okay, now on with my story. In elementary and middle school is when I begin “dating.” Wow, I’m already cringing. As look back at it now, I hate myself. You know how it goes, when everyone else around is getting boyfriends just for the heck of it and you have to fit in, yeah that was me, and so I did. The first boy I had talked to was the boy I chose. I hate myself. I never thought he was cute, or never thought of him in any way shape or form before. I just wanted a boyfriend. It was embarrassing almost. I wanted a boyfriend just to fit in with my friends but didn’t talk to the boy at all. I regret it. Then there was the next boy. I’ve known him for years and had a crush on him when we were younger but our friendship was rekindled. He liked me, and I didn’t like him. We were older and things just weren’t the same, but I went for it anyways. I don’t know why, I just wanted a boyfriend. A middle school boyfriend, how romantic. NOT. I’m pretty sure that “relationship” only lasted 8 hours, but who’s counting. I could add more on to the list of regrets, but I don’t want to waste my and your time. The moral of the story is I regret every single elementary and middle school relationship I have ever had. Unfortunately, those regrets had shaped my mindset today. I won’t just talk to someone for the heck of it. Yes, I still want a boyfriend, I guess, but I sure as hell won’t give just anyone a chance. My regrets from elementary and middle have made me very “picky,” as my friends would say, when it comes to boys.
ReplyDeleteIt’s easier to see a bad decision once you look at what you’ve done because you are not in your impulsive stage anymore. When we are in our impulsive stage, we tend to be close-minded and act irrationally.
ReplyDeleteWhat is the worst decision I have ever made? I remember when I was in nursery school, maybe I was about four years old, my group of friends and I made fun of a kid in class. I don’t remember exactly why, but I can clearly recall when my guy friends poured juice packs over a kid’s head. I regret laughing with my friends. I regret tolerating them. I regret that I thought it was “funny” at that time. Looking back on it now, I ask myself, “What did he ever do to us? What right did we have over him?” Being a bunch of four-year-olds definitely does not excuse us for treating other kids like trash; “trying to be funny” does not mean to get others involved and make fun of them. Because guess what? If I was the kid getting poured by juice packs, especially while everyone’s attention was focused on me, I would feel humiliated, disrespected, small, scared, and worthless. That kid probably felt the same way, maybe even worse. I remember he rarely went to school since the time of the incident.
At the time, my friends and I may be having fun and having the best day of our lives, but that joy was CERTAINLY NOT worth it. It badly affected someone else’s life; that incident might have been his most traumatic experience. He was afraid to go to school since he rarely went after that day, and we never saw him again in the following years. On the other hand, doing that bad deed also embarrassed our parents. Us, as kids, are a representation of our parents/guardians. If we do something bad, it will reflect back to our parents. If we do something good, it will reflect back to our parents. And I am embarrassed that I made my parents look bad in front of others. They did not deserve that because they did and still do the best that they can to raise respectful and obedient children.
I am not trying to be “miss goody two shoes”, but I honestly and sincerely want to apologize to that kid if given the chance, I don’t care if it has been thirteen years. Sometimes when I think about that day again, I worry that he might feel worthless. I worry that he becomes somebody that he isn’t supposed to be just because of a stupid, heartless, and immature entertainment.
What my friends and I did was not something we should be proud of; actually, it should be something we should be ashamed of. If my child makes the same bad decision, I will sternly talk to him/her. I will try my very best to make him/her realize what he/she did wrong. I will try to make him/her think about being in that person’s shoes and think about how he/she would feel. I will make him/her assess and understand his/her wrong deed.
Looking back at all of my mistakes, I know why they were all considered mistakes. I see the pain they've put me through, the tears I've shed, and the disappointment I've caused in my loved ones. Looking back at all of my mistakes I understand where I went wrong. Now that I know the bitter outcome of my mistakes, I can’t continue to make the same ones over again. A lot of times I make decisions without thinking things all the way through, because sadly I can’t predict the future. When I pick a road to go down I don’t know what is yet to await me at the other end until I get there. A large percentage of my mistakes are made due to the fact that I give everyone the benefit of the doubt. In my mind everyone has the same heart as me, so it’s hard for me to wrap my brain around how people can be so deceiving while having no remorse at all.
ReplyDeleteThe worst decision I’ve ever made would be giving my heart to a manipulative liar. Anyone who does not make you a number one priority is not worth the pain that comes with them. I allowed someone to make me feel worthless. I stayed in the situation so long that eventually, it broke me. I hated everything about myself. I couldn't understand why I was never good enough for that one person. Although it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do, I walked away from the situation for good. Now that I am mature and passed the stage of being angry, I have nothing but pity for him. He was never taught how to love, and he will never know how.
I believe that every mistake is worthwhile because it is the best way to learn. If I could go back in time the only thing I would change is the amount of time it took me to move on. I shouldn’t have allowed myself to be disrespected so many times.
I never want my children to have to go through the same thing I went through, and continue to go through. Although experience is the best way to learn, I would never want them to hurt as I do. Getting your heart broken is a constant pain everyday you wake up. Even though I have completely moved on, there are scars that cannot be healed. Even though so much time has passed by there are still nights where I sit up thinking about it, wishing I could forget.
Drake always said hindsight is 20/20 back when I was young, and I'll never forget his wise words. It is a truth, and a really valuable one to learn. I believe it holds true because you often have tunnel vision when it comes to what you want to do. You can only see one or two outcomes because you are so determined to proceed with whatever you want to do. However, once you look back at the trail you blazed, you can see all the routes you missed because now that it is over, you allow yourself to think more freely. Beforehand you were like, "This is the only way", and after you were like "Oh wow, I could have done this". It is simply because you already chose the path, and now you can see where that path has taken you. I haven't really had a life altering mistake before. All the mistakes I have made have been of immediate consequence. If I had to pick one, it would be the time I did not study for a final, and let me tell you, it was not worth it. An extra hour of sleep was not worth the final grade. If i could, I would go back and really prepare for it like it was a permanent grade that everyone can see. I would talk to my kids differently than the way my parents talk to me. The way they talk to me sometimes makes me mad. I'd talk a lot gentler after the yelling. Open them up with the yelling, and then heal with the soothing words. If my kid decides to be a slacker, then I will lay into him, and then console him. If that doesn't work, I always have old reliable. You can never go wrong with a nice, weathered two-strap belt. Make sure you get the thick leather kind. It may need to be broken in, so make sure you wear it often so you can use it at a moments notice. I never went wrong, and neither will your kid if you get one of these early on. If the belt has a brand then it is the wrong kind.
ReplyDelete10/10 ending
DeleteI honestly don't remember the last time I have ever made a bad decision. I mean yes I've had a fair share of regrets and bad decision making. Although in those bad decisions I've made are very minor. They go from "man I should've study for that test or quiz instead of slacking of" to "I should've listen to my dad" or "Why did I do that", and again they very minor. Whenever I made a bad decision I immediately try to forget it and say "Ok what did I do wrong". I remember my dad telling me that making bad decisions is natural and so we learn from our mistakes. So with whatever bad decision I've made when I was younger and now sort shaped me into what I am today. Also I've seen other people make mistake so I learn from them as well. I can safely say that I'm a goody two shoes because my parents have told me to always be nice, and that added fact that I went to a Roman Catholic school. So in those two environments have molded me to try and think more rationally and say is this good for me. Although I know that it really can't stop me from making an occasional bad decision. But what always though my mind is a rule called "the Golden rule" and "Come on Sean you know should've done that".
ReplyDeleteThere are times in your life where you instinctively react without thought. Especially when you’re put in tough situations, you don’t think; you just act. Very rarely, those actions can turn out good but a lot of the time we say/do stuff we don’t mean but since we didn’t get to think about it, we instantly regret it.
ReplyDeleteI joke around a lot and say my life is just one bad decision but that most brutal decision I ever made was when I forgave someone when they didn’t deserve to be forgiven. I had known this person for 8+ years of my life and I thought I could trust them with anything. We were best friends, the type where we couldn’t be apart from each other for longer than twelve hours. During my eighth grade year, that friend decided to turn their back on me and go after someone who I did not get along with at all. That friend knew I had a long history with that person they wanted to date but that didn’t stop them from dating each other. The friend basically shunned me and turned their back on me to date someone I had just dated a few hours before they pursued the relationship. I acted like everything was okay, I even took her on a family camping trip. I forgave her because that’s just the person I am. But as I got older, I realized I should not have forgave her because she didn’t deserve to be forgiven. If I could go back and not forgive her I would do it. For sure. It wasn’t worth forgiving her because our friendship is nonexistent and strained. If I were to have just ended the friendship then and there, it would have saved me a lot of tears and heartbreaks.
Again, I don’t have a desire to have kids. Never have, never will. But if I were to have kids, I would tell them to go with their heart. Every time I have listened to my heart, almost all of the outcomes have been positive (shout out to my mommas). I don’t ever want to be my child’s bully so I would have to really think about the advice I give them because it would have to depend on the situation. If my kids were in my previous situation, I would tell them to think before forgiving.
Hindsight is 20/20. That is true. It is a basic fact. Cause and effect applies to real life indefinitely. The things we cause or what others cause will always have an effect no matter how mild it is. However, the outcome is not always set in stone. The future can change. For example, if Americans vote for Trump as President of the United States the outcome seems bad, however, it might be worse or do an about turn where Trump does better. Very slim chance of that happening. Since voting for Trump as the representative or whatever he was nominated for, I do not know much about politics, voters have seen their flaw in doing so.
ReplyDeleteWhat is the worst decision I ever made? I can not remember something really specific that I want to repent. Only time I got a detention was back in elementary school. where I wrote a note and gave it to someone to not be named for confidential rights that he deserves yet I will say that on the note, i wrote that he is “(Some elementary kid insult)” and I do not feel bad about it. I can not remember what I said but I back it up now as I did back then. If I have to pick my worst decision I committed, I would say not talking. Second would be making fun of someone because of certain characteristics with the reason being that society leads it to this. I know it‘s wrong and I would like to change it as many others do too and yet we still make fun of people. Nobody is that nice. Back to talking, if I talked it out with him, we would have possibly be in good terms but like I said, I do not like the guy for no specific reason. Another case of “not talking” would be in high school. Because of not talking, I saved money and time. However, the benefits do not cover the cost of lost of happiness. It’s not that I am not talkative, it is just that I do not know what to say. I would spend time in real life situations to change the lack of words for me to come up with.
If I have kids, at least two as my grandma is blessed with two grandsons each from her daughters, and they do something wrong, I would not be as strict as my parents and mostly my grandparents were to me. There’s no way they would make the same mistake I did, hopefully, but if they make fun of someone directly that it leads them to some time in detention, I would act. I would show them the rights and wrongs of making fun of someone. A hypocrite is talking I know, but it is the job of a parent to right a wrong and teach what is right.
A little more than five months ago, I made this really bad decision. At least I think it was a really bad decision. I spent the most amazing two years of my life with this one girl and she was my everything. She was my heart, my home, my sanctuary, my happy place. All of a sudden, I got an urge that things weren't right. So I made a decision. That decision wasn't to go fix things with the girl of my dreams, but to destroy them indefinitely. Honestly, that was 100% the worst decision of my life; and every time I think about that night, I wanna say, I hate my self a little more.
ReplyDeleteThe saying hindsight is 20/20 is absolutely true. It is true because after you do something you really can see more clearly at what you did right or wrong. When you first go into what what are doing you don't have that clarity you have after you finish it. I don't really have a worst decision I've ever made but if I had to think of a really bad one I'd say it's when I didn't give a shit about school in 7th grade. I know this sounds really dumb but back when it happened it was really serious. It was at the tail end of the school year and I hated my "LAL" teacher so I just decided to not do work anymore. I ended up getting a C which doesn't even sound bad but to me and my parents it was like getting an F. Anyways my Mom was livid and she forced me to do my entire summer project before I could do anything fun. Needless to say I got it done in the first two weeks. In hindsight this was actually a good experience because it taught me to never be a slacker again and there was a benefit to it but if I could go back and change it I would have just simply done my work. In the future if this ever happened to my child I wouldn't treat them the same way. Not saying my parents are harsh because I got everything I deserved but I would explain to them the importance of doing work and how it will benefit them in their future life in high school and college.
ReplyDeleteEveryone makes bad decisions because it's a part of our lives that will happen to everyone. The moment when you do something you know is bad, look at what you did the next day and think of how dumb the decision was. When we look back on these decisions we can see that they were not right because we are not in the heat of the moment making the decision. We see how bad the decision was and learn from the bad decision. I have had bad decisions when I was younger, but those decisions didn't have bad consequences to them. I like to think of myself as a pretty good decision maker and in the recent years I haven't really made too many terrible decisions that were significant. The worst decision I have made was caring about what people think about what I do and how I look. I know there are people out there who don't judge people like that and for those people I respect them greatly because a world where all people were like that would be so much nicer. I used to always care about what people said to me about how I looked or what I liked to do and now I realize how bad of a decision it was. I look back and I know that I have real friends that actually like me for the person I am and I no longer care about what judgemental people have to say about me. I would change the mindset I had because it wasn't a necessary thing to think about all these years. My kids won't make this decision because I will teach them not to judge others by how they look and to ignore people who want to say judgmental things about you instead of letting them get to you like I did.
ReplyDeleteI think that people can see more clearly after doing what they have done because of the fact that emotions overpower reason, so while they are in the moment, they will not completely think clearly. Even when people are given time to think about something, their minds are still clouded with emotion so they pick what they think makes them happiest or what they believe is the best decision at the time.
ReplyDeleteThe worst decision I have ever made, and still tend to do, is that people I don’t want around me tend to gravitate towards me and because I don’t have much of a backbone, I allow them to. Now, they're not people who are detrimental to my health in anyway, they're just severely annoying, to the point of jaw clenching or even making me think of physically fighting them.
At the moment, I am still dealing with such people. At first, I did nothing but be nice to people who were either new or they didn’t seem to have many friends. During these times, I was either transitioning into middle school with no one in my gym class that I knew, or I was a freshman in high school coming to a new school where I knew only two people. Although these actions led me to have friends I did not want, I would not change my actions in the future. I would not do this because of the fact that everyone does deserve a chance.
I will try to guide my children in what they believe is the right choice, but I will let them learn for themselves. Obviously, the scenario will change how strongly I argue with them to keep them safe.
Just like Elizabeth Wong in “The Struggle to be an All-American Girl”, I regret trying to distance myself from my parents’ culture. Up until kindergarten, I was able to speak fluent Vietnamese and I understood everything that my parents said. When I was little, I used to watch Vietnamese comedy sketches with my family and it was my favorite thing to do. Now that I’m older and have forgotten more than half of the language, I wouldn’t be able to understand the same shows and the thought of not being able to enjoy it anymore because of the choice I made really makes me tear up. Once I was placed in ESL in kindergarten, I started to get the impression that to become fully American, I was never to utter my first language or eat Vietnamese food in public anymore. As time went on, I talked more and more English with my parents than Vietnamese. When I talk to them now without thinking, I naturally talk in English with a sprinkle of the other language in there. As more and more of my cousins are coming to America from Vietnam, I regret this decision even more because I can’t communicate with them comfortably. I realize now that language or the food I eat doesn’t matter. But, every day I lose more and more of this culture and, for me, it’s dying fast. This, I would say, is my worst decision I’ve ever made.
ReplyDeleteI don’t think hindsight is 20/20 all the time. Whenever there are still strong emotions attached to a memory, it’s hard to think rationally. This is the same when you’re in the moment making that bad decision. There are so many emotions and thoughts running through your head at the time. So, of course, when it’s calmed down and you’ve detached yourself from it a little, you’re able to see clearly [now that the rain is gone, haha]. But, sometimes you can’t blame yourself for your mistakes and you’ll just have to deal with it by learning from it.
When it comes to my future kids, if I know for a fact that something is not going to end up well for them in the future (like listening to music way too loudly or a bad relationship), then I will pressure my kids to save themselves and listen to me. Sometimes if they do something really bad, a beating might help (my mom used to hit me with giant chopsticks when I was little. Never again from her). But, I think if I can trust my kids, then I’ll let them make their own choices and accept them. I will give them some warnings and advice, though.
As funny as it sounds I don’t believe in 20/20 vision. When I think about me saying “ok I will change”, or “ok I should stop”, I never do. It is actually pretty sad. But when I think of my worst decision I have ever made it is pretty easy for me. As I actually think that this situation could change me. As many people new I worked at the school as a janitor this year. I gained the friendship and respect of everyone there. Until the last day. It is frustrating for me to talk about. I climbed up the vents in the blue floor gym with a co worker and got caught and fired. The feeling I felt was something I never felt again, as I don’t get in trouble as in confrontation like many times. I was truly sorry and I hope I can have 20/20 vision for it. It was during work on the last day. I put my thoughts and pleasures to cure my boredness and completely left behind the people working hard to get the building in good shape. I got nothing but selfishness out of the situation. If I could go back today I would and change everything. I take everything I do as something I can’t get in trouble for. I get a tingling feeling when I talk about it because the situation was so frightening. But the main thing that I think bad decisions can tell us is how responsible we are. A trait that I would love to be able to pass down. Bad decisions will teach you. But learning from it is not just a general thing it is if the person in the situation can change.
ReplyDeleteVote Oakcrest!!!!
People make the worst decisions when they are emotionally unstable. It is at those moments where at many times, we tend to react to certain situations without thinking about the consequences of how we approach these actions, and often in the end after contemplating, we regret them. This is because we reflect over our decisions and question if we could have reacted differently where we realize the reality of the issue, influenced by our choices.
ReplyDeleteI have made plenty of bad decisions in my life, as anyone else has. My personal, poor choices range from being funny, to stupid, to just downright painful and serious. So for the sake of this prompt, I will say this:
My worst decision ever was letting fear overcome me and inhibit me from doing what I wanted. I regret so many things such as not being very involved or not seeking help when I needed it, and when I reflect and wonder why I made those decisions, fear happened to be at the root of it all. My life was filled with desires and aspirations, and then came the "what if's". What if people think I am weird? What if they hate me? What if I publicly humiliate myself? I then realized it was not only fear itself, but a large part of the fear was worrying what others thought and worrying about the outcomes of trying new things, which in its entirety was partly responsible for my shyness. For instance, I let fear stop me from trying to play any sports here at Oakcrest all because of one incident four years ago that I let discourage me. As a seventh grader, I was encouraged to try out for the basketball team. However, although I am tall, anyone who knows me knows that I am terrible at basketball, and when I attempted at playing, I became a laughingstock. Regardless, I tried out for the school team in seventh grade, and when I did, I was so embarrassed that even the shortest could play better than me. I was not surprised that I did not make the team the next day, and since then, whenever I've had an offer to join any sports teams here at Oakcrest, I passed it as I had flashbacks to being humiliated and taunted for my lack of athletic ability, and I then adapted the belief from them that I am not an athlete, vowing to never play another sport again.
On one hand, it was great that I tried to play basketball back then, but I regret not at least trying to play another sport here such as soccer or volleyball because of this. It angers and upsets me that I did not choose to do those two sports because now that I am a junior who has not played a single high school sport, it would be very difficult or too late to do something by now with all the new added work as I should have been involved my freshman year. If I could go back and change it, I would have joined girls’ soccer and volleyball freshman year because I would have had more friends by now, more memories, a great experience, way more fun, and fully eliminated my shy character. This, however, taught me a lesson. When it comes to sports, I may not be as good as many, but at least I tried, though I should have tried it here in high school. People may say things against your interests, but if you truly desire something, do not be afraid to go for it because you may miss out on an incredible opportunity, and do not listen to the opposition. Instead, figure out how you can improve yourself to do what you want.
As a result, I will tell my future kids to not let fear prevent them from their desires, and unlike what I experienced, I will tell them to not tease and put others down from their abilities because you do not know what else they are capable of and how it will affect them, even if they may not show it.
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ReplyDeleteI agree with the quote, “Hindsight 20/20” because when people do things at the present moment, they do not think it through if what they are doing is considered right or not. Even if the outcome comes out as something good, we, as human beings, always find a fault in that moment and wish to go back in time to tweak it just a bit (or a lot, I don’t know).
ReplyDeleteThe worst decision I can think of so far is not studying for my SATs. It was near the end of the school year and finals were coming up. Clark had told us to not worry about the finals because it was only 10% of the overall grade, but I still wanted to get in some practice. So, when I went to take the SATs, I was not able to finish any of the sections and eventually got a lower score than my PSATs. This, I was upset for because the SATs was a paid standardized test, which told me that “hey, this is something I should be ready for” and I was not. So, was the decision worth what I LITERALLY paid for? Was the benefit worth the cost? No, because I had thought to myself that the final exams were more important than the SATs and took up all the time to study for those when I could have used the time for preparing for the SATs.
Honestly, when I have kids, I am just going to treat them like how my parents treated me. They did not give me any pressure and supported me by joking around. It may seem to some people that it looks as if my parents did not care, but I am usually an independent person, so I like to take things with people not being in my business. When it comes to making decisions, I learn by making the wrong choices than when someone tells me what is right and what is wrong. That way, I will be sure for the next time (if there is a next time) I will know to go with a different approach.
ReplyDeleteThe 20/20 hindsight anaphoric expression, I've never heard of it and I pretty much still don't get.I feel like I do but I'm over thinking its true meaning. Well whatever it not like it matters. Onwards to the main point of what I trying to exclaim. When it comes to the worst decisions I've made, it deals with character. People whom have great character are people who are bold, assertive, knows what they're doing and are confident. And I definitely know truthful that I don't really relate to what I exemplified. Overall the worst decision I made is letting people make my own decisions for me. I'm not bold or assertive enough to let the person know that I'm confident in what I am doing and what it takes to achieve it or overcome it. One mainly being my guidance counselor who basically chose my schedule for me throughout the entire year (except senior year) based on what a student needs to graduate. For example a student needs 3 maths, 3 sciences, 4 English's blah blah blah. (You already know how it goes). Those where the basic options she kept picking for me but I just went along with. Even though teachers recommend for certain classes, those classes don’t appear on my schedule. I didn’t even attempt to question what she was doing for I assumed it was normal. And since she was the guidance counselor I thought she was just helping me out but that wasn't the case. I later on found out the classes I should have taken were the right choice but the choices she made was absolutely wrong and it basically ruin my high school career. All because I wasn’t assertive and bold enough to tell her the choices she’s making is wrong. I also never knew of certain advantages in courses like math (doubling up), taking academic electives etc.I was supposed to take AP Lang last year but she persuaded me not to take it because it was a lot of work, college level, and if I attempted to join the class ( It was the middle of marking period 1) all be behind because “:I already missed” a great amount of lessons there. The same thing she said to me about the classes my teachers recommended me for. Overall I wasn’t bold and confident to tell her that the decisions she making for me was not up to my standards. Furthermore the result made me way behind in my courses compare to my friends from the same grade, it even made me question myself what was the point of successfully skipping 5th grade. Another decision I slightly kind of regret is coming to America to continue middle school and onwards instead of coming to continue high school. Overall America made me dumber despite me being born here. (Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad I came back to where I belong. America is a land of opportunities which helps you understand who you are. I would have never met the friends and people I have today.)Ghana ‘s education/ academic style is much more effective. They actually understand the meaning of don’t leave the student being. ( I going to save this part as an OP so I’m just going to end it here). If I could give advice to my future children, that would be don’t give in easily to what people say think before you leap into action.
Hindsight overall is 20/20 and is something that people will get to realize as they get older. As we look back onto memories, we see all of our bad mistakes that we would soon get to regret. But at the moment that we are performing this avoidable mistake, we thought that this was a cool idea or something that would be widely accepted among others. These regrets would heavily shape our lives and the reason for regretting these life-affecting decisions were because they had a larger consequence than what we thought we would have when performing this action.
ReplyDeleteMy whole life is full of tiny regrets that are the result of my stupid mistakes. I have the tendency to make the stupidest mistakes ever that would later come back to bite me in the butt. For instance, when I was still in kindergarten, my friends and I thought that it was a good idea to have a staring contest. It was not just an ordinary staring contest, though; it was a contest to see who can stare straight at the sun without blinking for longest. I ended up winning with an excruciating full two minutes and this was not just a one-time thing, it was a common thing that I participated in for the next few weeks. Obviously, the big lesson I learned was that staring at the sun for too long without any kind of protection can lead to some eye problems. Including permanent eye damage. This later leads to the many eye problems that I have, with the very strong prescription I have being the least damaging. I had to get eye surgeries to fix some of my self-induced eye problems which cost my parents a lot of money, only being able to fully pay off the medical bills three years after the surgery. If I had not participated stupidly in a ridiculous staring contest, I would have probably not needed glasses or those many surgeries that our health insurance luckily covered half of. It was definitely not worth the bragging rights of being able to stare at the sun for the longest out of my classmates. If I had known better, I would not have risked my two eyes, something I can not replace. I was part of the reason why my parents had to start taking loans, which leads up to my current situation with debt.
Usually, I joke about how when my kids are in third grade, I would be making them read the math textbooks. The conversation with them would humorously go something like this: “What was your favorite book son/daughter?” And they would respond, “The pre-calc book, daddy because it was so spicy!” The joke being that there is a red pepper on the pre-calculus book. But in reality, I would discipline my children so that they do not stray onto the wrong paths. I would force them to study and try to limit the amount of television and games that they would be exposed to, just like how my parents were. The main difference is that I would not result to the extremes of disciplining my children, which my parents do unreasonably, but I would not be afraid to hit them with a hanger as a form of a lesson. I would be the type of parent that stresses about grades when they start getting into high school, and unlike my parents, give them freedom if they are not doing too badly in school. I would give them the freedom to socialize, play games, and hang out with their friends; something that I did not have too much experience in. I would just make sure that they do not hang out with the wrong group of friends; the group that encourages not caring about school or their future. I do not want them to turn out as bums.
I won't say that I don't regret anything at ALL, but I don't regret many things in life. For the most part everything I do is pretty positive and the things I regret are pretty miniscule. I would start off by saying I really liked a guy and he caused my first ever anxiety attack, but looking back he really wasn't shit. He never would really give up all the girls he had crawling after him for me, therefore I do not feel as though he deserves one of my blogs, so I am going to try to think of a different one. One things I regret is not getting closer with my sister. Honestly I do think part of it is her, she has a very hard time opening up to people and I don't blame her one bit. I always felt like I was in competition with her, especially when it came to high school. I remember my freshman year I was so unhappy. I was hanging out with the wrong group of people. I feel like there were times Danielle tried to help me but I think at the time I was very blind to it. If there is one thing that I regret out of all of this it's thinking she was better than me. I remember every single day I would walk out into the kitchen in the morning and automatically think about who looked cuter: her or me. Almost every single time she won. I could not count to you the amount of times people would say to me "Your sister is so hot". I would sit and think to myself, she is gorgeous and she has flawless skin, and hair that isn't frizzy, and outfits that are unique and pretty. This was such a rough time for me because by constantly comparing myself to her I made myself feel horrible. I felt so ugly compared to her. I felt so slow at track compared to her. I felt so bad at sports compared to her. Most of all I felt inferior compared to her. I couldn't wait for her to leave Oakcrest, because it would be like a new beginning for me but I missed her a lot. I heard a quote that changed my outlook on life after she left, it says, "By comparing yourself to others it is like saying you can't be happy because someone else is happier." I found myself my sophomore year but I couldn't help missing her every morning at the bus stop, and seeing her in the hall at random times. I really regret all the moments we didn't share together because I miss her a hell of a lot. She means so much to me, I'm just afraid I will never get to have that sisterly bond that everyone else understands.
ReplyDeleteIf I ever had kids I would try to raise them as best as I could, carefree of what other people think of them, and the least judgmental children on this earth. If I had two daughters I would try to make them as loving people as possible. My sister had a hard time opening up and telling me things because she was more aware when my parents got divorced. She shut everyone out. She doesn't like hugs from my family, and she doesn't like telling them what's going on. I would want to make my kids childhood environment as good as possible. I will let my kids learn from their own mistakes, and tell them all my mistakes so they know theyre not alone and mistakes happen.
The effects of an action are clearly shown after the action is committed. This is because if you plan on doing something, your mind is clouded by thoughts that are biased. You force yourself to think that you are right in order to make yourself do it. After, although, your mind is cleared from the bias and you can analyze the actions as if you were someone else. Given that, I can now look back at the time that I compared my girlfriend to another girl and see my mistake. In hindsight, this was a definitely a bad idea considering how you should never compare people. There were definitely risks in making this comparison such as her getting mad, and never talking to me again. In all honesty, there was no reward in making this comparison. All it did was sadden her and the outcome was definitely not worth what I paid for it. What came out was a sad Jess and a sad Wilfred. Don't worry, we made up after, but the outcome of the decision solely, was just hurt feelings. This definitely wasn't worth the wait and this definitely had no benefits. If I could change anything, I would probably just not say anything at all. The statement was pointless.
ReplyDeleteIf any of our kids were to make the mistake of comparing their significant other to another person and they end up in a fight, well I would probably just tell them to apologize. Knowing what you can and can't say to a significant other is a learning process and it's something you should learn by yourself and it shouldn't be taught to you. Sure I could tell them not to compare, but in general, they have to learn what to say and what not to say. I would honestly not reprimand them because it's an easy mistake to make in the moment. They would also already by sad enough, they don’t need another person to just come and reprimand them to make them even more sad.
The worst decision I've ever made... Its a hard choice when you have so many options to pick from. But if I had to choose, I would say that the worst decision that I ever made was giving myself to people who simply didn't deserve it. And needless to say, the outcome was not worth it. Not even a little. I gave everything I had to give: my time, my patience, my effort, my heart, my soul. I did everything in my power to show affection and devotion. And in turn, I was left imcomplete. I was left with nothing, because I made the decision to give my all to someone who took it and ran out the door with it. If I could change things, I would. If I could get it all back, I would. If I could still be complete and whole, I would. And one day, I will tell my kids this story. I will tell them how pure Mommy's heart used to be. I will tell them that Mommy gave them that same heart that they feel beating right inside their little chest. I will remind them that their heart is just as beautiful as mine—even more than mine. And I will remind them that not everyone heart is as pretty. I will encourage them to be better than Mommy. To learn from her mistakes. And I will teach them to love themselves more than anyone else, so that they can keep all those parts for themselves. Because that what they'll deserve. Just like we all do.
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ReplyDeleteRegret, it’s one of the worst feelings on the long list of human emotions that people experience everyday. Whether it's missing an opportunity or being at the wrong place at the wrong time, Regret is something that everyone has felt or will feel, not because we make stupid decisions, but because we realize we should have taken a different path. If you ask me what my biggest regret is I would probably be one of the people to who say that I have no regrets, mostly because when I feel I have made the wrong decision, I move on and learn from it, I’m not the kind to cry over spilled milk.
But there is something, something that I wish I could go back and change, but sadly never can. I wish that I could go back and talk to my younger self. I wish that I could tell him how important school is and how important his grades are. I would go on to tell him to worry more about his future then how many friends he has, because when it comes down to it, and all your friends come and go (even when you try your hardest to make them stay) there is one thing that stays with you if nothing else, and that is your academic achievements. The reason I regret not doing my best in my previous grade levels is because I feel that I could have absorbed so much more information than I have, and there is no going back to fix that. I am not saying that it is too late for me to learn what i have passed up, but I feel as though I have just been dropped into 11th grade, not knowing what I'm doing or what is in store or me after high school. I am nervous about my future, but like i said, no use crying over spilled milk. I guess I just have to work twice as hard to make up for all that I’ve lost.
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ReplyDeleteI believe that you have to go through a few bad experiences to grow as a person, good or bad you need those times throughout your life. After you've been through these experiences you can see how you changed because of the tribulation you went through. I think the worst decision I ever made was falling in love with my friends little sister. The outcome was honestly good and bad because I almost lost a friend but almost won the love of my life. I did benefit from the experience but it was surely worth the experiences because now I know love comes in all shapes and sizes and sometimes you might fall in love with a person you would've never expected. I wouldn't change anything because I'm fine now and it's over with so why think about changing something you know you have no ability to fix, and the situation is all good now so I'm fine with the outcome. If my son or daughter went through the same bad decision I'll do the same thing I wish my parents did to me not tell me anything just sit back and let me encounter this problem and get passed it on my own because that'll teach them that throughout your life you're going to make bad decisions and daddy isn't going to be there to help you get through it every time so they'll have to learn how to do things by themselves. I'd just let them know if they think it's right who can tell them they're wrong and that I get that it's hard but nobody said winning ain't easy kiddo. Wish I could say that the was a real situation because i'd like to go through that someday but I couldn't really remember my worst decision besides prestiging in MW3 and losing all my guns, and I don't think that's serious enough to write a blog about.
ReplyDeletePeople do things on impulse. Everyone doesn’t think the whole picture through before the make a decision. But the biggest reason is how are we supposed to know where our choices will lead us? We don’t know what is to come. For all we know our decision in the moment is the best decision until we experience the out come. We can prepare all we want but will never have complete control of what is to come of our decisions. The worst decision iv ever made is letting go of a girl I still cared about. She was perfect and I knew that but with all the stress and arguments that pushed it out of my sight. I was only focusing on what was happening rather than the whole picture. At first everything would lead back to her. You see her favorite color and bam she’s in her head. You see a certain food she loved and bam she’s in your head. So many things that would lead back to them. It was haunting. But I moved on as most of us do. I’ve had new experiences that I hadn’t had yet. I wasn’t arguing anymore. So in way it was worth it. But all that could have been accomplished with her too. So I would probably change me decision and fought a little harder to make it work. But would this just be another decision I regret making? How should I know where Id be if I did.
ReplyDeleteThere's far too many times in my life when I remember something I did in the past and gag. I've made too many dumb decisions and I've definitely felt the wrath of the consequences that come along with it. I guess hindsight is 20/20 because I've never been able to predict the future and never will be. Lots of times in my life I make a stupid move without thinking about the consequences because it was "all in the moment". My parents always tell me to think before I talk or do anything. It seems super easy but it's actually really hard. And even when I think about the consequences there's still something unimaginable that happens. I wouldn't ever know, considering I'm not an oracle.
ReplyDeleteThe worst decision I've ever made has to be forgetting to say goodbye to my grandfather when I was 4. Although this seems really stupid, there's a whole back story that goes along with this and I'll explain it one day in my OP. Since I have hindsight now, I can definitely say the decision was no where near worth it. I had never said anything back then because I was a child. A timid, afraid child. But little did I know my selfish decision of not saying anything goodbye resulted into never being able to say anything to my grandfather ever again. Two weeks later my grandfather passed away due to cancer and the only reason I am pursuing a medical career today is because of it. If I had known the consequences before hand I would have never done any of this. I would've spent all my time with my grandpa for as long as I could. I would've said goodbye. I wouldn't have left his side.
To be completely honest, I'm completely clueless on telling kids what to do. I only know what happens to me. Therefore I can only say what happens to me. I guess that's what I'd do then. Experience trumps a lot of things. I guess that's how I'd reprimand or respond to my kid making the dumb mistakes I made. Tell them about what happened to me and hopefully they stop when they know what happened. I don't think reprimanding them would do any good. Considering I only get upset when my parents reprimand me, I think it would be better to encourage them not to be dumb like their dad.
Remember that voice in your head (no, not the schizophrenic one) that was practically screaming, "NO, DON'T DO THAT! YOU IDIOT! STOP!" while you did something stupid, or were saying something out of place? Me neither. Most people tend to ignore that voice, thus ignoring the only logical thinking in their possession. The voice, also known as one's subconscious, will most likely lead you to the correct decision to make based on all of your accumulated knowledge during your lifetime. My biggest regret is probably listening to it at the times where I probably shouldn't have from an emotional stand point; yet this was the right thing to do in the long run. Let me elaborate further; last year my phone was stolen in class and everyone knew who the degenerate piece of **** was that stole it. So, when he came back to the class after selling my phone somewhere in the building for drug money, I was on the verge of fighting this good for nothing, bony little drug addict. I resisted this thought though; my subconscious lead my thoughts in a different direction -- my future was not worth throwing away for fighting someone who will most likely die in a ditch somewhere. I say I regret this however because every time I see his moronic face in the halls, I have the urge to let loose and have him see the consequence of his actions, yet I endure every time. As for if this was worth the cost, I know it is because my future is looking bright.
ReplyDeleteLooking to the future, I believe my kids will turn out fine. I will lead them to the path of success, raise them with the correct mentality, and then leave them to their own devices to see what they do. That is not to say I will not help guide them if they go astray, such is my duty as a good parent, however I will allow them some independence when I feel they are capable of making educated decisions. If all else fails, I will have to take out one of the oldest tricks in the book:(just like Tobi's fallback plan) the belt. I don't care what anyone else thinks or society's views on it, with control, (and not abuse of it) the belt is hands down the most effective disciplinary teaching tool. Ultimately, I believe my kids will turn out fine.
Bad people make bad decisions, good people even make bad decisions. So who makes all the good decisions? Well isn’t the answer obvious? Nobody. Everyone makes decisions even if they regret them in the future. People can be blinded by their emotions, their ego, or their oblivion. And this is why people regret the things they do in the future. That is, if they are a strong enough person to own up to their not-so-good choices and aren’t stubborn about their life.
ReplyDeleteFurthermore, the worst decision I have ever made has been going on since I was 7 and is still continuing. I let my dad convince me to play a sport, I don’t even like, just to make him happy. To give you some background information, my dad was a big time jock in high school. Star football player, track and field winner, he also played baseball and did wrestling. I’ve heard him say a thousand times that he would love to have a son, so he could buy him sneakers and coach him on the football field. Similarly, as you can imagine, when I grew up he wanted me to be an athlete too, despite me being his daughter. But obviously, (if you know who I am today) I did not want to play football or wrestling. So the only realistic sport I could play was softball. My dad has been my coach up until high school, and he strived for me to be the best I can. The only problem was that I didn’t like playing, and I didn’t want to get better. I regret not telling him the truth about who I am and what I like to do earlier in my life. Now, he knows that I am 100% dedicated to band and have a passion for music. But, I think that I made this decision to keep playing for so long because I wanted to keep that connection with him. That I was scared he wouldn’t love me or look at me the same. But on the other side, I loved having something we could talk about all night, and I loved spending time with him every practice and every game. But was it really worth my happiness for half my life?
However, if you want to hear how this story ends, I can’t really tell you. I want to quit this year because I ended last season with a bang, but how can I tell my father that the last thing we have in common, I’m done with. But what I can tell you is that he supports me one hundred percent in my music. Even though he usually picks colleges for me that have a good football team, he wants me to be in a big band at one of those colleges. He always tells me that Ohio University and UCLA has good bands, they’re good, but I’m just happy he’s trying to make me happy. Ultimately, when I have kids, I want them to know that they should be the ones to decide what activities they want to do and what subjects they like. I don’t want them to be influenced that much from me (I mean it would be amazing if they all played an instrument), but they can be apart of whatever they want. And they shouldn’t let their father or me decide their future and who they are as a person.
Mistakes are a common in my everyday life. I make mistakes everyday and suffer the consequences of each and everyone of those mistakes. The biggest mistake that I ever made actually had the smallest amount of consequences. It was a warm spring afternoon when I got off the bus with my sister and her friend. It was only 6th grade at the time and my sister forgot her keys in her locker. First we went and checked for the spare key. Wasn't there. We looked around in utter disbelief and figured the best solution was to find a way in. We first checked all the windows on the bottom floor. They were all locked. Then it came down to my stupid idea of climbing the roof and going through a sliding door on the other side of the house. We grabbed a ladder and set it up on the house. The roof was steep, and at one part if i fell I would have fallen 3 stories on to some hard ground and died. But i made it to the balcony and got in. Looking into the future if my kid ever did that I would explain to them the dangers of climbing on a roof. I would make sure they understood and then i'd be satisfied.
ReplyDeleteWhen we make most choices we can see most of the outcomes. The problem is that people's brains tend to suppress the negative outcomes and enhance the positive ones. This makes us feel like we never thought of the consequences when in reality they were there all along. I definitely have my fair share of regrets but many are tiny and hardly major in my life. One that bothers me the most though is the mentality I had for sports when I was younger, specifically soccer. I loved playing soccer but when it came time to put in work at practice I just didn’t try. I let my perfect opportunity of playing a sport I love at a high level slip away. When I was younger I did not have the same type of body now, I was more lean and agile. I was super quick and could play most positions on the pitch but my lack of work ethic allowed me to gain weight. I went from a pacey, tall athlete to a sluggish, lazy one. I even at one point stopped playing (but it was only for a little over a year). This was mainly due to the fact that I couldn't make the traveling team I had been playing with for the past few years because of my digression. Looking back I wish I would have gave the effort I do now because who knows where I would be. I had the potential so playing professional soccer wasn’t totally out of question. You never know and that’s the worse part of regrets, the lack of answers, the would of, should of, could of. For my kids I would actively push them to stick with sports if possible although you never know if your kid will want to do sports in the first place. I can picture myself as being a very lenient parent so while I might really hope one of my kids takes up a sport that dream could be just a fantasy.
ReplyDeleteI’m 16 years old. I’m at the age where I’m supposed to make mistakes and learn from them on my own. The worst decision I’ve ever made was putting a boyfriend before my bestfriend. For three years I was bestfriends with this one kid. For some reason I let my boyfriend tell me I couldn’t talk to my bestfriend anymore, or he would break up with me. Right then and there I should’ve known the right thing to do, but I didn’t. I knew my best friend was always there for me through it all, for so long. I knew he would’ve done anything to make sure I was okay. I knew he was the one person I truly cared about and didn’t want to ever leave my life. I knew he always had the right thing to say. I knew he always looked out for me. But I threw that away for some boy that I had only been dating, at the time, for four months. Some boy that took advantage of me and always made me let my guard down. The difference between my boyfriend and my bestfriend was that my bestfriend would’ve done nothing to ever hurt me. Knowing the right thing to do, I still chose the wrong thing. I don’t know if it was out of fear or what. But I do know, I wish it never happened. After my boyfriend and I broke up, my bestfriend did take me back. But ever since then, things just have been different between us. It makes me sad to even think about it because I really am the reason why our relationship will never be the same. He says he’s forgiven me, but a part of me knows that he never truly will.
ReplyDeleteOne day, when I have children, they will begin to make bad decisions too, and the best thing I could do for them is be there for them. It’s impossible to protect your kids from everything, as much as parents may want. So I will make sure to talk to my kids about my bad decisions and just hope that they won’t repeat them. I want to be that parent that is comfortable with their kids, and knows how to talk to them. This is because I have parents like that, and I couldn’t appreciate them more.